Where has the art of bagging groceries gone?

I remember when I was in high school that a lot of my male classmates had jobs at local grocery stores bagging groceries. Thinking back - I don't know why girls didn't hold this position. Hmm - maybe they did, but I don't remember. Anyway, back then, the grocery bagger (aka cute boy) would bag your groceries and then helped you - OK, my mom - out to your car and even put them in your trunk. Then, after the trunk was closed shut, my mom would give them a tip. We arrived home with our brown paper grocery bags filled with groceries and everything was perfect. No crushed bread, broken eggs or smashed tomatoes.

So, fast forward 25 years. Grocery stores do not use brown paper bags anymore, they use plastic, or in my case, I bring my own reusable grocery tote bags. Also, the people who are bagging the groceries do not know how to bag groceries - and they are not cute boys.

So today I was at my Chicago grocery store of habit, lets call it the Pearl. I don't go there because of the wide aisles, or the smell of freshly baking bread in the bakery, (it's a city grocery with a parking garage) I go there because it is exactly 6 blocks from my house.

So in I go with my 4 reusable totes, with the Pearl screeed on the side of the bag indicating I am a loyal customer. As I choose my groceries, I put them in my totes accordingly. I have a special tote that is supposed to keep cold food items cold and the rest are just regular totes. By the time I get to the checkout line my arms are killing me, but hey - I know how many bags I'm going to have to carry up the escalator to the grocery store parking garage and then haul up 3 flights of stairs when I get home. I'm pretty smart that way.

I started unloading my items on the conveyor belt (I swear that thing speeds up when I go near it) and being the anal person I am, I place my groceries in the order I would like them rung up. You know, all frozen foods together, all cold foods, all meats, canned items. You get the idea. You would think that this would help out the grocery bagger. Oh - and also the fact that I told him (again, not cute) that I would like all of my cold items in the blue tote and the rest in the green totes.

Once again, me being anal and all, I watch as the checker scans each item - to make sure I get my buy one, get one free items, well...free. Also I've had items scanned twice before making the whole buy one get one free just a slap in the face - because not only did I not get one free, I paid for one that I didn't even get. Grr.

The checker finally totals up my purchases and then realizes that I have wine. "21 on aisle 7," she yells on the loud speaker. Fine. Now I have to wait for someone who is 23 years old to come over, check my ID, look at me, make me take it out of my wallet, turn it over (because it says it's expired on the front and there is a sticker on the back) look at me again, look at my license, look at me yet again and say "wow, you've changed." "Yes, yes I have, I say. It's been a few years since I got my original license and thank you very much for pointing out that I have gained weight...Or, were you referring that I look much older?" You're on thin ice here checker-girl I think to myself - and... I so do not dye my hair - it's natural. Really - it is. I'll be 40 and I've yet to see a grey hair. The Gods are with me on this one.
$68.92 - that's your total - cash, debit or credit?

Finally, done with the interrogation. We've now figured out 3 things. I am in fact over 21, I have gained weight and I will pay with my debit card. That only took 10 minutes. So I mosey on down expecting to find my neatly packed groceries in their respective totes. But, did I honestly think my grouped efforts of food items and clearly marked totes were enough. Nope. Apparently I need to invest in a P-Touch to help the bagger bring it home.

He says to me "you didn't have enough bags so I put the remainder in plastic, is this OK?" At this point I am irritated, Ellen is going to start soon and I have to pee. I thought to myself. I can take two roads here. The high one or the learning one. I chose the learning one and promptly informed him that all of the groceries in the 5 bags were once in 4 bags at the beginning of the line. Then, I unpacked my groceries (finding the bread under a few canned goods) and repacked them so he could "learn"' how to properly pack grocery totes.

Being the National Day of Service, I do feel I did my part.

I hate waiting in line

Today I went to Marshalls. Bad idea. I figured that I was pretty safe going there at 1:30 on a Monday afternoon - I figured everyone would be working. I was so wrong.

So wrong that not even the employees at Marshalls were working.

How many people have to be in line to prompt a cashier to get on the loudspeaker and request back up? Is there a rule of thumb? (Why do they call it back up anyway? - If there were an ample amount of cashiers working to begin with, the line wouldn't get backed up - making it necessary to call back up.) 5 registers, peak Christmastime shopping, city of Chicago...why weren't there already staffed with 5 cashiers? Where is the damn manager?

I got way off track.

So, anyway - I went there to return an item I purchased a while ago. I even had the receipt. They have 2 lines corralling people into either the "purchase line" or the "return line." Since I got off the elevator (which has to be the slowest elevator in Chicago - please debate me if you have a slower elevator) and not the escalator (half the time it is broken and you have to walk up - or down, which ever the case may be) I stepped out into Christmas 1/2 price land.

I gathered some items and made my way to the cashier(s) all 5 of them. I debated for about 2 seconds which line to get in. The purchase line - since I did have new items to purchase; or the return line - once again, I did have something to return. I analyzed the line length and chose the return line. Is was shorter. The purchase line had at least 25 people in line. Seriously - not kidding.

So there I was - waiting in my shorter, but still people filled line. By the time it was my turn I placed my return on the counter, presented my receipt and proceeded to wait for my return transaction to go through. After I signed - I looked at the cashier and he looked at me. Then I looked at my Christmas items on the counter and then looked at him. We did this game for about 32 seconds. Finally - I asked him to please ring my items up. "Sorry ma'am, you are in the wrong line." First - I am no ma'am. Second, I waited in this line - the return line - for 25 minutes. "Can you please just ring up my 5 items?" He said "No."
No!
Are you kidding me? You want me to get back in line - the long one, and wait another 25-40 minutes to ring up my purchase. "Yes, he said." "Nope, not going to do it, I said." Then he said I had to. I had to? Then a little light went on in my head. "So, if I return my item for a return on my credit card, the transaction is done right?" "Yes, he said." Then I said, "I want to purchase my items with credit from my return." He rolled his eyes - said something to the gal next to him - and then begrudgingly rang up my purchase.
Victory! Yes, a small one, but I deserved it.

I then got back on the elevator to ride up one measly level to my car - and fate stepped in. I rode down 2 levels to the basement - where a family of 5 (smelly big people) got on (seriously the elevator beepy beep sound should have gone off), and then back up 3 more levels - stopping each time to let on more people - to finally get off at Parking level 2 - alas, my car.

I got home and realized that I never bought what I went there in the first place to get - slippers for my husband. So - I will be returning tomorrow - hoping not to get the same cashier. Ugh.

Yep - I've finally done it.

Blah, blah, blah, blog.

OK, I finally have a blog. It's not as if people are oiling up their RSS feeds to read it, but I do feel more in touch with my Web 2.0 self for now.

My husband says I'm the like the Mrs. Kravitz of the 'hood. It's not really that I'm nosy - it's that we live in a condo building - in a neighborhood of 100,000 people - in a city of over 6 million people. And, well, I am just inquisitive. One might say a keen observer...and my computer overlooks a window that overlooks a lot.

So, I figured instead of me wondering to myself (or to my oh-so sensitive husband - who has all but lost the ability to hide the boredom from his face when I'm telling him about my last trip to the post office) about all of the stuff I see and encounter each day - I would just blog about them.

Yep - that's it. Blah, blah, blah, blog.