I hate waiting in line

Today I went to Marshalls. Bad idea. I figured that I was pretty safe going there at 1:30 on a Monday afternoon - I figured everyone would be working. I was so wrong.

So wrong that not even the employees at Marshalls were working.

How many people have to be in line to prompt a cashier to get on the loudspeaker and request back up? Is there a rule of thumb? (Why do they call it back up anyway? - If there were an ample amount of cashiers working to begin with, the line wouldn't get backed up - making it necessary to call back up.) 5 registers, peak Christmastime shopping, city of Chicago...why weren't there already staffed with 5 cashiers? Where is the damn manager?

I got way off track.

So, anyway - I went there to return an item I purchased a while ago. I even had the receipt. They have 2 lines corralling people into either the "purchase line" or the "return line." Since I got off the elevator (which has to be the slowest elevator in Chicago - please debate me if you have a slower elevator) and not the escalator (half the time it is broken and you have to walk up - or down, which ever the case may be) I stepped out into Christmas 1/2 price land.

I gathered some items and made my way to the cashier(s) all 5 of them. I debated for about 2 seconds which line to get in. The purchase line - since I did have new items to purchase; or the return line - once again, I did have something to return. I analyzed the line length and chose the return line. Is was shorter. The purchase line had at least 25 people in line. Seriously - not kidding.

So there I was - waiting in my shorter, but still people filled line. By the time it was my turn I placed my return on the counter, presented my receipt and proceeded to wait for my return transaction to go through. After I signed - I looked at the cashier and he looked at me. Then I looked at my Christmas items on the counter and then looked at him. We did this game for about 32 seconds. Finally - I asked him to please ring my items up. "Sorry ma'am, you are in the wrong line." First - I am no ma'am. Second, I waited in this line - the return line - for 25 minutes. "Can you please just ring up my 5 items?" He said "No."
No!
Are you kidding me? You want me to get back in line - the long one, and wait another 25-40 minutes to ring up my purchase. "Yes, he said." "Nope, not going to do it, I said." Then he said I had to. I had to? Then a little light went on in my head. "So, if I return my item for a return on my credit card, the transaction is done right?" "Yes, he said." Then I said, "I want to purchase my items with credit from my return." He rolled his eyes - said something to the gal next to him - and then begrudgingly rang up my purchase.
Victory! Yes, a small one, but I deserved it.

I then got back on the elevator to ride up one measly level to my car - and fate stepped in. I rode down 2 levels to the basement - where a family of 5 (smelly big people) got on (seriously the elevator beepy beep sound should have gone off), and then back up 3 more levels - stopping each time to let on more people - to finally get off at Parking level 2 - alas, my car.

I got home and realized that I never bought what I went there in the first place to get - slippers for my husband. So - I will be returning tomorrow - hoping not to get the same cashier. Ugh.